Tag Archives: humour

NaPoWriMo 2015 Day 28 – Notes

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I* once knew a young man* in Norwich
who enjoyed** teaching classes*** in college****
I liked a good rhyme*****
if a few at a time******
flurb******* flergle flarg fliggle floridgh********

—-

*actually same person
**broadly
***seminars
****university
*****debatable, both the good and the liking
******is this even English
*******..wha?
********You just gave up, didn’t you?°
[°but you rhymed, well done. I guess.]

NaPoWriMo 2015 Day 8 – (Alter)Ego

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You’re making me…
You wouldn’t like me when I’m…

..who am I kidding, liking is a given.
You’d like me when I’m angry
you’d like me when I’m hungry
you love me, really, in any way.
Not to be childish,
but I just woke up – what do you say?

Ignore that grey dude,
go for something fresh.
There’s a green, lean, lovin’
machine buried in here
and it’s about to burst out
into song – yeah, good at that too.

Never mind the gamma ray,
think more gabba gabba hey.
I got a whole lotta love
to share with you
and I’m not letting it drop
like a lead balloon.

I can feel it pumping
just for you – or you –
radiating from inside.
Come closer, there’s no danger.
Trust me: I’m a doctor.
Should I put it on a banner?

Nothing puny about this god
you can bow in adoration.
I’m a smash hit, babe,
a revelation – feel the funk.

Yeah, that’s right.
I’m the Incredible Hunk.

NaPoWriMo 2015 Day 4 – Just About

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Cram for a test,
cause sluggishness and
break for 10 minutes.

Prepare for school:
is it that time again already?
Make only general purchases.

Break the procrastination
but keep putting it off?
Make a bet with your family.

Find out your IQ –
open other doors
with a good approximation.

Improve your memory:
points of most techniques
use the acronym ‘HOMES’.

Get your child to
mention harassed staff
– a clue to its desirability.

Help your child
try on everything
through the local buildings.

Network effectively;
the Doggy Olympics
are just the tip.

Get out of debt.
Throw away the pieces.
Many are Free.

[A found poem made up by flitting between the pages of How To do Just About Everything (M&S 2008), using a pattern based on the value of the word ‘Saturday’ (A=1, B=2, etc); the last stanza is the sum of the letters (160).]

140Story – Another one

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Another small story to capture the immensity of reality? Probably accurate.

Check out the new 140Story website for more microfictions!

140Story – Festive Edition

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New year, new short short stories – and this one is definitely not inspired by my Italian grandmother. She hates rhymes.

Make sure to head over to the new 140Story website to find more tiny tales!

non
So Grangsta, yo.

140story – Star Wars edition

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If you’re even slightly into film, media, popular culture and geek culture, you’ll have noticed that there is something stirring in the Star Wars universe right now. With that in mind, I thought I’d drop in to 140story and contribute a themed tiny Twitter tale.

If you’re anywhere around Norwich this Thursday, make sure to drop by The Forum at 7.15 for UEA Live! with Tash Aw, and a host of 140story writers!